Forty

[tcpip]

Despite its strong Judeo-Christian overtones many years ago at the tender age of 16, I decided that U2's 40 would be my song when I reached that age. So here I am; forty years old. It ain't so bad; the day was like any other although I must admit, I think my chance to be a champion athlete has passed :-)

Is there supposed to be a radical moment of self-reflection of one's achievements at this stage, representing the nominal half-way point in one's life, or the time it takes a generation to arise? Muhammed received his first angelic revelation at 40.. how about that for dealing with a mid-life crisis?

If I am to do so, I feel a great sense of good fortune. Despite my social background, I've managed to drag myself to a comfortable financial situation, and yet I feel strongly for those who have not had the opportunity or circumstances to improve their lot. I can look back in past and present careers; education advocate and researcher, political advisor, computer systems trainer, systems administrator - with modest degree of satisfaction with the actions and results.

I have been blessed with a modicum of good looks (or so I've been told) and a gregarious personality, which has meant good fortune in love. Indeed, I have been much blessed by past and present partners and from each and every one of them I have learned valuable, positive lessons of life and relationships.

At forty I can feel relaxed, comfortable and satisfied. Yet there is still a buring fire within that wants to take back the future, to remake the world and that project still has another two score to run - at the very least.

Comments

Re: Awwwwww...

[madame-mage.livejournal.com]

I sincerely believe this is commonplace even in the States. I know Im not supposed to make general statements, but in my experience, I've seen this, when men are viewing the big Four O with terror, there'd be a myriad of reasons why the panic, most of them have the mindset of a big kid figuring they'd never grow older, chase women (nothing wrong with that) and suddenly L I F E is looming and staring at them in the face. There's a few wrinkles that shouldn't be there, and a few grey hairs that weren't there a couple of months ago.

Bit disconcerting.

Its worse if they have to start all over again from scratch financially as I've finally figured it out that most men's backbones at least here in the states are tied with their net worth. If the have the extra cash it takes the sting out of growing older.

Once again I have to say I value intelligence and one's ability to reflect on the past, do well in the present and await the future with calm. This is what I see when I read your posts and your replies to your friends!.

Hope your birthday was A BLAST! *grins*

Re: Awwwwww...

[tcpip.livejournal.com]

I think you've hit the nail on the head. Lacking decent people skills or the desire to be genuinely interested in the meta-issues (whether that's a geeky approach to a science, a radical's approach to justice or the aesthetes approach to beauty), they are left nothing but a desire to accumulate money.

And one day, probably on their 70th birthday, they wake up and go "Shit! What happened to my life!?"